12:00

Imaginative / creative writing goes here.

12:00

Postby Alca » Tue Sep 22, 2015 7:31 am

It's been too long since I last wrote anything, so I came up with a little something. Hopefully I'm not too rusty. I tried to write something a little different than usual. It's just a vignette of sorts, but thanks for reading.


In the corner of an old bar the clock strikes midnight. The bartender takes no notice and wipes a glass with slow, deliberate motions, stopping only occasionally as the odd customer orders a drink. Near the center of the room a young girl in her mid teens sits facing the door, staring at an old textbook of sorts. She isn't actually reading it however. She glances at the pages only as a formality; something to distract her as the hours pass. She occasionally hums along to a languorous jazz melody which plays in the background, it sounds familiar, though she wouldn't be able to name it.

Time appears to move slow. Unnaturally slow in fact. She looks up from her book and checks the clock. The hands still sit on twelve. She sighs, then begins to turn back to her book, hoping to pass the time until morning arrives. However, she's soon distracted as the door swings open and a young boy not much older than her enters. He has short, rough hair and wears ordinary clothes. He scans the room for a moment, then sits opposite her.

"Mind if I sit here?"

She shrugs and gives him a look that says Feel Free, then returns to her book again.

"Aren't you Ran? Ran Himura right?"

She puts her book down and eventually speaks, "That's right. I don't think I've met you before though."

"Well, that's not exactly important right now. I'm Keiji. Can I get you a drink? A glass of wine perhaps?"

"T'm underage."

"That never stops me..." he pauses for a moment, then looks at the book curiously, "I suppose you wouldn't tell me what you were reading even if I asked, right?"

"Probably not."

He sighs and gives a defeated expression, then calls over to the barman.

"One beer please."

The barman nods and begins to pour a pint of beer as Keiji turns back towards Ran.

"So, what's a girl like you doing in an old bar like this? No offence, but you look a bit out of place sitting there."

"I can't tell you that."

"Because you don't want to?"

"Because I can't. I don't remember."

She rubs her head in frustration, as if trying to remember something, then she takes a cigarette from her coat pocket and lights it up before placing it in-between her lips.

"So alcohol's off the table, but smoking's fine? You're one interesting girl."

"We all have our vices."

She takes a puff of the cigarette, then balances it on the ashtray. The mark of lipstick stains the end with a perfect imprint.

"Mind if I?" Keiji asks, carefully picking up the cigarette.

"If you want," she shrugs, turning back to her book.

Keiji brings the cigarette to his lips and breathes deeply, then starts to splutter, producing a small grin from Ren. It's the first time she's smiled tonight.

"First time smoking?"

"And the last time..."

He places the cigarette down again, then idly taps his fingers on the table. The music in the background starts to fade out, then starts to play from the beginning of the song again.

"You said you don't remember what you were doing here, right?"

She nods.

"Mind if I ask you something? Did you notice that the clock hasn't moved an inch all this time."

She puts the book down and peers at the clock again. He was right, the hands still remained exactly on twelve o'clock.

"So? It's probably just broken"

"Then check your watch."

She puts down the book, then looks at her watch incredulously.

"Probably a coincidence," she replies, as if trying to convince herself of that fact too.

"And that song in the background... How many times has it repeated now?"

She freezes still as the pieces come together. She hadn't realized before, but up until now the jukebox had been constantly repeating. It was far too much to be a simple coincidence.

"What are you trying to say?" she asks, shaking in hesitation.

"I'm saying... It's time to wake up."
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Re: 12:00

Postby Sifter » Tue Sep 22, 2015 10:01 am

Ouh I love how this is coming along. Some parts of dialogue could have been omitted for the sake of pacing, but the way you've built it up to the very last line was quite something, in my opinion. So, I like it! Looking forward to the rest!
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Re: 12:00

Postby Raymond » Tue Sep 22, 2015 2:52 pm

Good read Alca. It's interesting where you left it off. It leaves you open to continue this story in numerous directions. I'm still asking myself why this under age girl was dreaming about herself in a bar with a random stranger. I need answers lol, I hope you continue it.
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Re: 12:00

Postby Mitch » Tue Sep 22, 2015 3:08 pm

Not moe murder story can you get it the fuck together
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Re: 12:00

Postby Alca » Wed Sep 23, 2015 4:19 pm

Sifter wrote:Ouh I love how this is coming along. Some parts of dialogue could have been omitted for the sake of pacing, but the way you've built it up to the very last line was quite something, in my opinion. So, I like it! Looking forward to the rest!


Thanks for reading. You're probably right about the dialogue. I get carried away sometimes and rely on it a bit too much, I could have cut away one or two lines without taking away from the plot any. I'm glad you liked it though...

Raymond wrote:Good read Alca. It's interesting where you left it off. It leaves you open to continue this story in numerous directions. I'm still asking myself why this under age girl was dreaming about herself in a bar with a random stranger. I need answers lol, I hope you continue it.


Thanks. To be honest I don't exactly know what's going to happen either yet, I pretty much think up the plot as I go along. I have a rough idea though, and yeah, I'm planning on continuing it sometime.

Mitch wrote:Not moe murder story can you get it the fuck together


Sorry for the disappointment. I'll have to pull my shit together.
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Re: 12:00

Postby Hype » Fri Oct 02, 2015 8:16 pm

You HAVE to finish it. That little read was very entertaining. Nice work :3
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